It's a Dog's World by Sam KW.
You believe in love at first sight?
This is how it happened. I saw this big, Irish Setter with a light colored stripe across the body. She's not really a dog, but hey, it’s a dog's world. I can make up my own story. To tell you the truth, the throaty rumbling noise she made got me to think of her as one of the big ones. Yup, I have a thing for'em!
Anyway… where was I?
Oh, yeah! The Irish.
It was only a coincidence that these two two-legged crazies, a light-haired one and a dark curly-haired guy, always came with Irish. The thing is… I really loved her legs, and I was determined to get'em. I'm talking about the Irish-Setter here, now don't you get distracted with something else.
It's not like they were the only limbs I could use when I need to go, but, something about her well-kept, clean, round and shiny feet… all right, already… wheels, if you really want me to be specific, were really attractive. Just what I prefer!
What?
You think us dogs don't have preferences? You think I'd go on that tall one's multi-shaded Greyhound? No way. NO WAY! I'd have to get a tetanus shot if I even allow myself to go near it. And I've got enough jabs in me for my lifetime, Thank you, very much! Why do you think I ran away and started living on my own?
So… I started following Irish, unnoticed, but Mr. Light seemed to always see me right away. It wasn't easy to get to Irish like I had wanted to because I always found her in the middle of some gunfire going back and forth. I ran outta there before I got sent to dog's heaven. Now, don't get me wrong. I do like to relieve myself… without getting slugged in the process. I'm not that desperate.
Then one night, during my neighborhood watch, I see Irish parked in the better parts of the city. I took a peek inside this joint to make sure the ones who toured the city in this dream Jane of mine wouldn't come outside and find me doing my thing on their thing. But wasn't my day-- the tall one saw me and got all excited. Got me thinking for a minute whether they were onto my potty plans, but didn't appear to be so. Curly was electrified. I didn't even have time to protest when the two of them took me on a ride along in their striped Irish Setter.
"We have to keep him, Hutch."
"Now be reasonable. Will you? How are we going to keep a dog? Dogs aren't allowed in Venice Place."
"I can keep him with me."
"That's ridiculous. You have any idea how much work go into keeping a dog?"
"He saved your life, Hutch. Doesn't that count for something?"
"Doesn't mean we have to keep him, Starsk. He may belong to someone, you know."
"He has no collar."
"Starsky… then we have to take him to the humane--"
"Shhh! Not in front of him."
So went on a whispered conversation between these two humans about how inhumane the humane society conditions were. Light-haired one said they had no other choice to which Curly replied that there's always a choice and that they had to do the right thing.
Didn't they know that my hearing capacity is way higher than theirs?
Youhave any idea what a difference that point five of an octave could make? Gets one to know one, and you guys would never know because you aren't dog-ones!
Well… I and my eighteen muscles that controlled the shaking, tilting and rotating of my ears remained utterly relaxed. I pretended to be asleep, snoring here and there to get my point through.
From what I understood, Curly wasn't going to let me instuitio-- Institiced- internationalized? No. it was something else. Don’t make me say tongue twisters. I don't know what all that was about, but Curly had something going on in his mind. I could tell. He didn’t want the other one to know about it, but he said that he's going to take care of me and that Mr. Light-one didn’t have to worry about it.
"Don’t do anything stupid, Starsk."
"I've always made the right decision-- chosen the right ones. Don't you think?"
That made the other one shut up quite quickly.
After Curly dropped off Mr. Light at his home, Venice Place I presume, the palace that has no room for dogs, Curly turned towards me and winked. "I have a plan for you, Dot-Spots, and you have to play along."
Now that's my kind'a man! I wagged my tail to show my appreciation.
Wait. Dot-Spots? What kind of-- Oh, well. How can I say no to him? I liked my new name.
"Don't you think for a minute that I fell for your sleeping act, fake-snorin' n' all. You shoulda be ashamed of yourself," Curly said. For a second or two I wondered whether I got him all wrong… until I saw the twinkling in his eyes. He was pleased with me.
I stretched as much as possible from the back seat towards him and licked his face.
Anyway… I spend that night with Curly. He gave me a shower and fed me well. Sandwiches with 'spotted' meat for dinner and sugar cookies for dessert were something I could get used to very easily. Later he sat with me for a serious talk, man-to-dog and vice versa.
"I want to keep you all for myself," said Curly. "But I really can't keep-keep you."
I perfectly understood. I licked his face again. Give it to me straight, Curly. No matter what, I know you aren't going to let me down. I trust you whole-heartedly.
"I have this lady-friend. A real sweetheart. If we play our cards right, we both get what we want from this deal. But you, Dot-Spots, you have to be on your best behavior."
Now that's what I know how to do best. I sat in front of Curly and put my head on his knees, giving him my patented brown-eyed look that could arrow into any heart, deep into the soul of it.
"That's my boy," Curly chuckled. "Win her heart, and she'll take you in."
Is he giving me up for adoption? I woofed.
"Don't get me wrong. I'm not givin' you up completely, Dot-Spots. I'm gonna propose joint-custody."
So here I am, and have been for three weeks now, being pampered, fussed and loved by a wonderful and kind lady called Minnie. I'm not sure whether Mr. Light knows anything about where I am because he never comes to visit me. Why Curly keeps me a secret, I'm not sure.
Oh, and that love at first sight I was rambling about. You know, the Irish Setter-- I get to see her frequently. I've got myself trained to not to use her anymore. I like to keep her as she is- all beautiful and shiny. I ride with her and get to spend at least a day every week with Curly. I figured, since Curly and I owned each other, I'm also responsible to keep Irish spotless, because it didn't take that long for me to realize that Irish had also stolen Curly's heart a long time ago.
Did I tell you that Curly even allows me to sleep with him?
Yes! In his bed. Where did you think? He grumbles about me being too warm, but never pushes me away.
Sometimes Curly brings me a big juicy bone when he visits me.
"I can't take you today, Dot-Spots." Curly got all apologetic for missing a day with me. "I'm on a stakeout tonight. Not a place for you to be, buddy."
I pushed my nose into Curly's palm and whined.
"Hey—you gotto have faith in me." He lay his other hand on my head. "I promise that I'll always get you whenever I'm free. And someday…" Curly scratched behind my ear and smiled. I dipped my head giving him enough access. This one knows how to treat a man.
What was he going to say? I wish I knew. Was he planning to bring me back to his place, permanently – Someday?
He's the best-- that one -- a keeper. Keeps on telling me that I'm the best and that I saved his partner. I have no idea what he's talking about, but I'm all right with that. I'll play along if it means getting those treats every week. I know Minnie likes Curly's visits as well. Gets all mama-like and bakes him cookies and stuff. He's getting spoiled rotten. Maybe it's the cookies he's coming for, and not me.
What none of them know is that I have a Misiz Dot-Spot in my life, and a couple of little Dot-Spots are on their way. Mama-Minnie and Papa-Curly are in for a real surprise. I have my plans already. If one of'em little ones won't end up with Curly, I'm ready to lose all my spots. After all, the kids are going to learn from the best.
Wait… that conversation we had. Curly said… Someday. And his eyes… come to think of it, became all soft and gentle while saying that.
He couldn't have known that I've been sneaking to see my Misiz-- Could he?
******************************************************************************************************************************
You believe in love at first sight?
This is how it happened. I saw this big, Irish Setter with a light colored stripe across the body. She's not really a dog, but hey, it’s a dog's world. I can make up my own story. To tell you the truth, the throaty rumbling noise she made got me to think of her as one of the big ones. Yup, I have a thing for'em!
Anyway… where was I?
Oh, yeah! The Irish.
It was only a coincidence that these two two-legged crazies, a light-haired one and a dark curly-haired guy, always came with Irish. The thing is… I really loved her legs, and I was determined to get'em. I'm talking about the Irish-Setter here, now don't you get distracted with something else.
It's not like they were the only limbs I could use when I need to go, but, something about her well-kept, clean, round and shiny feet… all right, already… wheels, if you really want me to be specific, were really attractive. Just what I prefer!
What?
You think us dogs don't have preferences? You think I'd go on that tall one's multi-shaded Greyhound? No way. NO WAY! I'd have to get a tetanus shot if I even allow myself to go near it. And I've got enough jabs in me for my lifetime, Thank you, very much! Why do you think I ran away and started living on my own?
So… I started following Irish, unnoticed, but Mr. Light seemed to always see me right away. It wasn't easy to get to Irish like I had wanted to because I always found her in the middle of some gunfire going back and forth. I ran outta there before I got sent to dog's heaven. Now, don't get me wrong. I do like to relieve myself… without getting slugged in the process. I'm not that desperate.
Then one night, during my neighborhood watch, I see Irish parked in the better parts of the city. I took a peek inside this joint to make sure the ones who toured the city in this dream Jane of mine wouldn't come outside and find me doing my thing on their thing. But wasn't my day-- the tall one saw me and got all excited. Got me thinking for a minute whether they were onto my potty plans, but didn't appear to be so. Curly was electrified. I didn't even have time to protest when the two of them took me on a ride along in their striped Irish Setter.
"We have to keep him, Hutch."
"Now be reasonable. Will you? How are we going to keep a dog? Dogs aren't allowed in Venice Place."
"I can keep him with me."
"That's ridiculous. You have any idea how much work go into keeping a dog?"
"He saved your life, Hutch. Doesn't that count for something?"
"Doesn't mean we have to keep him, Starsk. He may belong to someone, you know."
"He has no collar."
"Starsky… then we have to take him to the humane--"
"Shhh! Not in front of him."
So went on a whispered conversation between these two humans about how inhumane the humane society conditions were. Light-haired one said they had no other choice to which Curly replied that there's always a choice and that they had to do the right thing.
Didn't they know that my hearing capacity is way higher than theirs?
Youhave any idea what a difference that point five of an octave could make? Gets one to know one, and you guys would never know because you aren't dog-ones!
Well… I and my eighteen muscles that controlled the shaking, tilting and rotating of my ears remained utterly relaxed. I pretended to be asleep, snoring here and there to get my point through.
From what I understood, Curly wasn't going to let me instuitio-- Institiced- internationalized? No. it was something else. Don’t make me say tongue twisters. I don't know what all that was about, but Curly had something going on in his mind. I could tell. He didn’t want the other one to know about it, but he said that he's going to take care of me and that Mr. Light-one didn’t have to worry about it.
"Don’t do anything stupid, Starsk."
"I've always made the right decision-- chosen the right ones. Don't you think?"
That made the other one shut up quite quickly.
After Curly dropped off Mr. Light at his home, Venice Place I presume, the palace that has no room for dogs, Curly turned towards me and winked. "I have a plan for you, Dot-Spots, and you have to play along."
Now that's my kind'a man! I wagged my tail to show my appreciation.
Wait. Dot-Spots? What kind of-- Oh, well. How can I say no to him? I liked my new name.
"Don't you think for a minute that I fell for your sleeping act, fake-snorin' n' all. You shoulda be ashamed of yourself," Curly said. For a second or two I wondered whether I got him all wrong… until I saw the twinkling in his eyes. He was pleased with me.
I stretched as much as possible from the back seat towards him and licked his face.
Anyway… I spend that night with Curly. He gave me a shower and fed me well. Sandwiches with 'spotted' meat for dinner and sugar cookies for dessert were something I could get used to very easily. Later he sat with me for a serious talk, man-to-dog and vice versa.
"I want to keep you all for myself," said Curly. "But I really can't keep-keep you."
I perfectly understood. I licked his face again. Give it to me straight, Curly. No matter what, I know you aren't going to let me down. I trust you whole-heartedly.
"I have this lady-friend. A real sweetheart. If we play our cards right, we both get what we want from this deal. But you, Dot-Spots, you have to be on your best behavior."
Now that's what I know how to do best. I sat in front of Curly and put my head on his knees, giving him my patented brown-eyed look that could arrow into any heart, deep into the soul of it.
"That's my boy," Curly chuckled. "Win her heart, and she'll take you in."
Is he giving me up for adoption? I woofed.
"Don't get me wrong. I'm not givin' you up completely, Dot-Spots. I'm gonna propose joint-custody."
So here I am, and have been for three weeks now, being pampered, fussed and loved by a wonderful and kind lady called Minnie. I'm not sure whether Mr. Light knows anything about where I am because he never comes to visit me. Why Curly keeps me a secret, I'm not sure.
Oh, and that love at first sight I was rambling about. You know, the Irish Setter-- I get to see her frequently. I've got myself trained to not to use her anymore. I like to keep her as she is- all beautiful and shiny. I ride with her and get to spend at least a day every week with Curly. I figured, since Curly and I owned each other, I'm also responsible to keep Irish spotless, because it didn't take that long for me to realize that Irish had also stolen Curly's heart a long time ago.
Did I tell you that Curly even allows me to sleep with him?
Yes! In his bed. Where did you think? He grumbles about me being too warm, but never pushes me away.
Sometimes Curly brings me a big juicy bone when he visits me.
"I can't take you today, Dot-Spots." Curly got all apologetic for missing a day with me. "I'm on a stakeout tonight. Not a place for you to be, buddy."
I pushed my nose into Curly's palm and whined.
"Hey—you gotto have faith in me." He lay his other hand on my head. "I promise that I'll always get you whenever I'm free. And someday…" Curly scratched behind my ear and smiled. I dipped my head giving him enough access. This one knows how to treat a man.
What was he going to say? I wish I knew. Was he planning to bring me back to his place, permanently – Someday?
He's the best-- that one -- a keeper. Keeps on telling me that I'm the best and that I saved his partner. I have no idea what he's talking about, but I'm all right with that. I'll play along if it means getting those treats every week. I know Minnie likes Curly's visits as well. Gets all mama-like and bakes him cookies and stuff. He's getting spoiled rotten. Maybe it's the cookies he's coming for, and not me.
What none of them know is that I have a Misiz Dot-Spot in my life, and a couple of little Dot-Spots are on their way. Mama-Minnie and Papa-Curly are in for a real surprise. I have my plans already. If one of'em little ones won't end up with Curly, I'm ready to lose all my spots. After all, the kids are going to learn from the best.
Wait… that conversation we had. Curly said… Someday. And his eyes… come to think of it, became all soft and gentle while saying that.
He couldn't have known that I've been sneaking to see my Misiz-- Could he?
******************************************************************************************************************************